County Fair!

In honor of the fact that I'm going to have the pleasure of attending a state fair shortly, I thought I'd post the following piece that I wrote in 2005. I wrote this after attending my first fair of any kind. Ever. Needless to say, it was quite overwhelming to me!

City Girl in a Country World: My first fair experience (July 2005)

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to attend the Hancock County 4H Fair. Having never set foot on a fairground before, this would prove to be quite an educating and enlightening experience.

The trip down the long, flat stretch of I-70 was rather un-eventful. As we neared the fairground, I still had no idea of what to expect. We turned onto the fair road and were directed to park in the grass by a smiling policeman of substantial girth clad in a lovely brown uniform. Somewhere between the cop and the parking field, we must have entered the door into some sort of parallel universe. A strange and twisted world where llamas dress up as golf holes and go crazy while mulleted people of all shapes and sizes amble around in overalls while gnawing on an assortment of deep fried delights. It was unlike anything I had ever seen before in my entire life.

As we entered the fair area, I looked around in some odd sort of awe. We were immediately led up a wet, muddy path. It was crowded with costumed children leading their costumed llamas up a small hill. It was chaos like I have never seen before. Like a scene out of some strange movie, I was surrounded. A girl in a bathing suit and fake flippers led a llama in a shark costume on a leash. A panicked mother rushed to fix a llama’s outfit which was falling apart. A big, fuzzy yellow girl with a tail stood with her big, fuzzy yellow llama as they waited outside the doors. What the heck were they?!? A pudgy young girl with an awful wig (or was that her real hair?!) dressed like Dorothy and sported a grin that made her look insane. Yeah. We sure AREN’T in Kansas anymore…I didn’t know where to look or where to go. I was being led on a llama lined trail to who knows where. I suddenly felt more overwhelmed and confused than I have ever felt before. I didn’t know what any of this was about. What awaited me in the building when I got to the top of the hill? I felt so lost as questions filled my head. Was this real? Was I in some sort of weird dream? Where do I look? What do I do? Do people REALLY do this kind of thing? Did someone slip something into my drink at lunch? I don’t think I could have picked my jaw up off the ground if I tried. What WAS all this? This must be how a country person feels the first time they venture to a big city. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

We entered the “arena” and sat down in the bleachers as I talked, probably quite incoherently, to my fair companion. I have no memory of what I was saying, but I’m sure I was asking lots of questions. The intermediate division of the llama costume competition was going on as we arrived. Santa Claus and the llama present; the swimmer and the shark llama; the car boy and his car llama (I have yet to figure out what this was); Sonny and the Cher llama. Each took their turn to parade these odd creatures around a ring for the packed audience. Apparently, llama costume contests are quite popular! Who would have guessed? Then came the caddie and the golf hole llama. Something just wasn’t right from the start. Almost immediately the golf ball fell off and into the ring. The animal clearly wasn’t happy. Then off came whatever was on its head. About 2/3s of the way around the ring, pandemonium erupted. The llama began kicking and bucking violently about, as it thrust its costume off. My immediate reaction was to burst out laughing. But then it occurred to me. Was this proper llama show etiquette? Just how exactly is one supposed to behave at this sort of event? Would I offend people by laughing? Just how seriously do people take this? Are you supposed to sit there and gasp in horror as the llama drama unfolds? Or is it acceptable to think it is funny and start laughing? Is it really, truly funny, or is the kid in the ring about to get mauled by his former llama buddy? My second wave of confusion hit. Luckily everything was ok and the golf hole llama got a grip and calmed down.

Then came the second round of llamas. The advanced division or something like that. This one had the big, fuzzy yellow girl with a tail and her big, fuzzy yellow llama, who shook her rear end while the chicken dance music played. It also had Batman and the Riddler and a kid handing out cracker jacks with a cracker jack box llama. One of the more interesting ones of the evening was a prince and his llama princess. As they paraded around, the announcer read on her out of date sound system, the tale of how the prince searched and searched and finally found his llama love. Interesting to say the least…

So after the llama show, we explored the fair some more. First we ventured into the sheep pavilion. I have never seen (or smelled) anything quite like it. I was blown away by the awful stench, and to my surprise, there were people sitting in some pens in lawn chairs like they were camped out there with their animals. I personally don’t understand how someone could breathe in there. We walked through as the sheep baa-ed at us. Then we got an elephant ear, or “lions paw” as they referred to it. I must say, it was quite tasty. It was on to the bird and rabbit area after that. I saw the biggest rabbit I have ever seen. I didn’t even know they got that big. When we arrived, there was a dirty young boy in between all the cages. From the way he was, it appeared as though he too was in a cage. I didn’t realize they displayed children at the fair too! Later he emerged with a small chicken sort of thing and let us pet it, while he told us about it. Surely we had just witnessed one of the country’s future great poultry farmers in action. God Bless America!!! The stench in there was even worse than the sheep pavilion. I don’t think I like birds too much. At least when they are alive anyway.

We decided to take a stroll around the midway after that. Gangs of local teenagers were roamed about. I even heard two of them arguing about who had the better fair. “No, WE have the better fair,” one exclaimed. I guess they take these things pretty personally. I also saw a country kid trying to hustle a prize out of some other kid who was running his game booth. Maybe had he grown up in the ghetto of some city, he would have had more luck.

After purchasing some corn and doughnuts, we moved on to the cow area. Now, I like cows. My friends and I even had some sort of mild obsession with them in 6^th grade. But I have never been around so many before. I didn’t really want to venture into the area while I was eating. Given the stench and the fact that we were dodging cow pies left and right, didn’t really make me have much of an appetite. I tried to get my fair companion to stop so I could finish my corn, but she seemed on some sort of quest. I was led up through the cow area at a fast pace, and out into the open, where people were leading cows around on leashes as they poked them with sticks. One cow even let loose as it got jabbed, right as we were walking by. What a lovely treat to see. I had no idea where we were going, but I was surrounded by cows and dirty farm kids. Was this some sort of fair initiation she was putting me through? Finally we were back on the original llama path, which by now was clear. And so ended my first time at the fair. When I told people about it at work the next day, I was promptly asked if I had done acid. I guess not everyone in Indiana is familiar with these things.

Some things make no sense!!

So here goes one of my rants about the ever-present stupidity I seem to encounter on a daily basis. My apartment complex has a clubhouse for the residents to use. It has many of the typical things you'd expect an apartment complex clubhouse to have. A fitness center. A laundry room. A business center with computers/fax machines. These three things are all open 24 hours a day. They are all located in the same building. In the same part of the building even. Yet every day, they lock the glass doors to the business center and force people to use an entrance separate from the fitness center and the laundry room. Mind you, this is only after hours. When the office is open, people can go freely from the laundry area, the fitness center, and the business center without having to go outside. Why on earth is it necessary to section this off when the office is closed?! To give you an example, if someone wanted to do laundry at 10 PM and wanted to stay in the clubhouse to use the computers, they'd have to go in one door, do their laundry, exit out the same door, then go into the computer room through a separate entrance. All because the management feels they must lock the glass door that separates the computer room from the connecting hallway that goes to the fitness center and laundry room. I absolutely fail to see what the point of this is. Maybe that's because there is none!

Bums and drunks

I think that growing up in a city very close to the Big Apple was quite the opportunity in many ways. Being so close to New York City, it afforded me many other opportunities that I would have never had elsewhere. Like encountering a bum up close and personal for the first time. I went into the city with my dad who was playing the organ at a church one Sunday. We walked to Central Park afterwards and I decided to go on the playground. I was playing around and having fun like any normal kid. Then I spotted a slide with a playhouse at the top. Now this seemed like the coolest thing to me and I was eager to go explore it. I climbed to the top and went into the house and was quite frightened to find a drunken bum passed out inside. As fast as I could possibly manage, I was out of there and running for my father. I can remember going to the Museum of Natural History at a very young age and seeing a bunch of people lying there on the street and I thought they were fake dolls. The drunkard in the playhouse incident brought home the fact to me that bums were actually real people.

Water, weddings, woefully long road trip!

Wow. I kind of forgot I had this thing for awhile, as should be obvious by the fact that nothing has been posted for so long! I've had an eventful end of June to mid July and now that I'm back home and the busy parts have passed, I'm feeling quite bored. I took a long car ride to visit my family. Someone who was driving to the same area as I was going offered me a ride for next to nothing. Couldn't really refuse that, especially with the price of gas! I'd had a ticket back in April on Skybus Airlines, but it went bankrupt literally 2 weeks before my trip. So it was nice to finally be able to go. The highlight of my trip was going kayaking with my brothers and father on the Delaware River in PA. I was gone for 10 days, then as soon as I got back, I was a bridesmaid in my friends wedding. Now I'm not a girl who has to do her hair and makeup and look "perfect" at all times, so this was certainly a new experience for me. At almost 28, I had never even worn makeup before! Just never had the desire to and I've been blessed with good skin, so I feel there's nothing to cover up anyway. Needless to say, getting all dressed up like that was a bit overwhelming at first. But here's my little secret to the online world. I actually liked it. Maybe I'm more of a "girly-girl" that I though. Not that I'd want to do it often, but it's kind of nice to have occasion to do that once in a while.

Virgil's Micro Brewed Diet Root Beer

Continuing along the lines of my last blog, here is another drink review. A bit of a background first. I'm always on the search for good tasting, low to no calorie drinks that are healthy for you and don't contain artificial chemical sweeteners like most diet sodas do. Personally, I'd much rather eat my calories than drink them! It's proved to be quite a task to actually find drinks like this with very low to no calories. In the past, I'd found plenty of drinks with calories in the 60 to 100 range, but if you drink 4 of these a day, that would be 240 to 400 calories in drinks alone. While better than drinking tons of juice, that's still too much for me!

I usually shop for groceries at places along the lines of Whole Foods. Up until quite recently, I hadn't found any diet sodas that were super low in calories. Until I discovered Virgil's Micro Brewed Diet Root Beer. This stuff only has 6 calories per 12 oz bottle. And it tastes really great too. It contains no artificial sweeteners at all and instead relies on the plant based stevia and xylitol for sweetness. For those who are unfamiliar, xylitol is a naturally occurring substance that is found in some fruits, vegetables, and other plants. It has the benefits of being good for your teeth and some studies have shown that it aids in the prevention of cavities. Stevia is an herb that has been used in certain parts of the world for hundreds of years. It is completely calorie free.

Because of the use of these two products in the Diet Root Beer, the drink is considered to be a dietary supplement. On the label, it has "supplement facts" instead of "nutrition info". The label also has an illustration of a guy who looks quite a bit like Jesus in a plaid shirt, serving up the root beer to some kids sitting at a table. I guess that must be Virgil though. But he sure does look like Jesus to me.

This diet root beer has a really great flavor to it and has just the right amount of carbonation. Not too much and not too little. It leaves a bit of an aftertaste of xylitol, which doesn't bother me, as I enjoy the flavor. However, some people may not like this. Overall, I think this is a wonderful product and I hope this starts a trend of more super low calorie natural diet sodas being created. Virgil's brand also has diet cream soda and diet black cherry soda available as well, although I have not tried them.

Inko's White Tea

I came across Inko's White Tea about two years ago and have been hooked ever since. It needs to be pointed out that this is an iced tea that has already been brewed. The tea comes in 16 oz. glass bottles. It comes in a wide variety of flavors, but my personal favorites are Honeydew, Blueberry, and Peach. Each flavor that I've tried has a crisp, light flavor that is very refreshing. With only 56 calories per bottle and 14 grams of sugar, this is a healthy alternative to sodas or fruit juices, some of which contain over 50 grams of sugar and 300 calories for a comparable serving size! Plus, tea contains quite a bit of good anti-oxidants which have numerous health benefits.

The only potential downside for some people may be the price. At close to $2.00 a bottle, some might not want to pay that much. However, I personally feel that to get better quality products, we often have to pay more. So it's worth it! If you can't find it in your local grocery store, they'll deliver it right to your door. Check it out!
http://www.healthywhitetea.com/

Life is short.

I haven't blogged in almost a month. Some friends of mine have been dealing with an awful tragedy. They lost a good friend in a bad motorcycle wreck. He was engaged to be married in November and was only 29. I had only met him a few times. (They all live in a different state.) But he seemed like a great guy and I know my friends adored him. This really hits hard. I've never known a person my own age who has died before. When someone young dies, it really makes you stop and think about your own life and the fact you could one day be gone in an instant. May you rest peacefully, Jeff.

On to happier things. I'm planning to write some reviews of several things in the next few days... So, you can look forward to a review of a really good, flavorful iced white tea; diet root beer that's actually good for you and doesn't contain any chemical sweeteners; and another diet soda made with green tea and doesn't contain chemical sweeteners.
Stay tuned...